The Pervasiveness of Abusive Men
It’s midnight. I’m going through some emails, closing some tabs, looking at what went into my “saved” links on Facebook over the past few days. And almost everything I’m returning to to read is another examination of the Brett Kavanaugh sexual assault allegation story. (My own take is here.)
The TV is on in the background but I’m not paying much attention. When I’m up late at night writing or catching up on work, I often put on either HGTV or MTV Live to keep me company. As I’m pondering the million different things that this story has made me remember, and the million different ways it feels like a slap in the face to all women, I hear a familiar falsetto. And I look at the television, and it’s Cee-Lo Green.
Today, the day that Bill Cosby was sentenced to prison for sexual assault. The day that the president implied that two women who raised credible allegations against his Supreme Court pick were lying. And even though these stories are very top of mind in this moment, without thinking about it, I’m humming along to the music of a man who once said that it wasn’t rape if the woman was unconscious.
We cannot escape this crap. Men who have done shitty things to women are everywhere. They are on TV and in movies and making music and writing books. They are getting away with it, or at the very least, being offered redemption arcs so…